The First Of March
by Cleo Leo
Summary: There was nothing unusual about the phoning ringing on a Saturday. But the moment Blaine's Dad handed it to him he knew something wasn't right. Sometimes, it is better being wrong, and Blaine desperately wished in this case he had been. Klaine


A one shot I need to get out of my head so I could continue on with all my other stories. It was causing some sever writers block because it was all I could think of. Please see authors note at the end when you are finished, important information.

I own nothing really.

**The first of March**

Blaine was in the backyard of his parents house when the phone rang. He watched as his mom dragged her clippers along the stem of the goldenrod she was tending, measuring where to make a cut so it could be placed into the make shift bouquet Blaine was holding. September was coming to an end, the first month of his senior year blurring in Yearbook pre-order, class ring arrivals, singing practice and coffee dates. His mother coaxed him out to the garden with her that Saturday for his help, since the flowers would only hold their bloom for so long and the least they could do was brighten up the house.

"Blaine," his Dad called lightly, stepping on to the back porch, the home phone clutched against his chest. "Mr. Hummel's on the phone, he want's to speak with you."

Blaine walked over, confused by the odd look on his fathers face. He took the phone and held it against his ear. "Hello?"

The voice on the other end was muffled, but Blaine was able to understand what was being said. The arm that clutched the flowers fell to his side, limp, but the plants miraculously stayed in his hand. Blaine shoved the phone back at his father, bolting through the house and grabbing the keys to his car and speeding to Kurt's house. Upon arriving he didn't consider how rude it was to just burst through the front door without knocking, but he was not thinking of manners as he tore his way up the stairs and into to Kurt's room.

His heart jumped up into his throat. Kurt was sitting against the window, staring into his lap. His eyes looked empty when they connected with his own, dry but painfully red.

Blaine walked over, setting the goldenrod bouquet that had yet to leave his hand on Kurt's vanity. He kneeled down, reaching to take Kurt's hands in his own but Kurt pulled them quickly away, clamping them over his mouth. Blaine fought desperately against the heat that filled his eyes. He buried his head in Kurt's lap, swallowing a sob, roping his arms around Kurt's slender waist. He almost broke down when he felt Kurt's fingers twine into the sides of his hair and bend over so his soft cheek fell against the back of Blaine's neck. Blaine swallowed hard, panting as he fought the urge to cry

"Don't cry," Kurt pleaded.

X

Burt Hummel had gone for a long drive. His son asked to be left alone for a while, which really meant that he needed to cry and was to afraid of what that might to do to his dad. So he agreed, pulling out his phone to make a sobbing call before he got into his car.

When he came home sometime after three in the morning, he peeked into his son's room, not surprised to see Blaine sitting in a chair by the bed, watching Kurt with tired eyes, ghosting his finger tips along the brown hair splayed around the pillow.

"You should be sleeping too," Burt said quietly.

Blaine looked up, his fingers not stopping. "I can't."

"I know."

Blaine shifted slightly in his seat."Carole said it was okay if I stayed."

"She was right," Burt said, leaning against the door way looking and sounding a hundred years older then he had the day before. "But you ought to get some sleep, I can set the couch up for you."

"I'd rather just stay here, if that's okay with you Mr. Hummel."

"Alright kid, I ain't gonna make you move."

Blaine shifted in his chair again. After the hangover mess there was an agreement that Blaine was not to sleep in Kurt's bed. He wouldn't want to tonight anyways, he didn't want to fall asleep. He needed to be awake he needed to watch Kurt, incase anything happened, in case Kurt woke up and needed something.

"Is he going to be okay?" Blaine choked

"I don't know. Doctors aren't sure if the caught it in time. Bone cancer...I don't know."

"I'm sorry Mr Hummel."

"I know," Burt sighed, feeling weight pressing down on him increasingly in the passing seconds. "Blaine, I'm really...I can't even... I know."

"Carole said she would still be up," Blaine offered.

Burt could only nod, shutting the door softly and walking down the hall to his room. He kicked off his shoes and pulled off his coat, letting it fall to the floor. Sliding into his bed, his wife's arms curled around him, holding him tightly while he cried.

X

When Blaine woke up and his back hurt. He was slumped awkward on the chair, his head had fallen over so it rested on the top corner of Kurt's pillow. Kurt wasn't in bed. Blaine sat up quickly, spotting Kurt sitting cross legged on the floor, a lap top open, the mouse slowly scrolling down the screen. The early morning sunshine was tripping lazily through the windows making Kurt's pale skin sparkle in hues of gold and bronze and causing a brilliant glare across the screen.

He stood cautiously, quietly kneeling behind Kurt to see the tabs on the page. The words made him frown.

"What are you doing?" Blaine asked, his voice distraught, pushing the lap top closed.

Kurt didn't look ashamed. His face remained neutral and his voice hit Blaine's ears with a painful tone of indifference."I was looking up information on last will and testaments."

"And why would you be doing something like that?" Blaine snapped.

"Because I might need one."

"Stop it," Blaine commanded. "There isn't need for that."

"Not yet," Kurt said standing slowly, "but there might be."

Blaine followed Kurt to his feet. "That's not okay," Blaine repressed a growl. "You can't do stuff like that Kurt. The Doctors don't even know what they're going to find yet. You can't plan a funeral when all they have is one blood test."

Kurt shrugged. "Cancer is cancer."

"Please don't do that. I can't help if that's how this is going to go."

"There's nothing you can do Blaine."

Blaine kissed Kurt's mouth. It was a firm and reassuring pressure that Blaine couldn't go without. He kept their lips attached for a few moments before pulling back, letting his head fall against the curve of Kurt's illuminated neck. "I can be here for you."

"You promise?" Kurt asked, the worry he obviously had working it's way into his voice.

Blaine smiled, sliding his senior class ring off of his right hand. "I swear to be here for you, be whatever you need, no matter what, for every moment, as long as you want me." He took the gold band with the red stone and slide it onto to Kurt's left ring finger, as Kurt had his own class ring on his right.

Kurt laughed at the ridiculous of Blaine's action."You don't need to give your class ring as proof, I believe you."

"It's a symbol of my promise."

"Fine," Kurt smiled, reaching for his own, "then you have to wear mine."

"Kurt, you don't have to–"

"Please?" Kurt asked, his lower lip tucked beautifully between his teeth. "I want you to."

"Okay, but just until you get better," Blaine agreed, and let Kurt slide the ring onto his hand.

"Deal, ring swap just until I'm better."

X

Blaine wanted to be at every doctors appointment, but sometimes he couldn't. He had school and Warbler practice, and even though he said he would rather skip to be with Kurt, Kurt insisted that he go.

"You can't drop everything to come with me," Kurt argued with him while they stood by the front door.

"But I want to," Blaine rebuked, hitching up his bag. "I want to be there with you."

"You can't hold my hand during a CT. It's alright, you went to my first meeting with the oncologist and to the bone marrow testing. Stay at school tomorrow and don't even think about ditching. I'll call you when I'm home."

"Call once you leave the hospital so I can meet you here."

"Fine, bring your homework," Kurt said, giving his nose a quick kiss. "You know you have to turn the work in to receive grades on them, right?"

"I told you, I turned in those missing assignments, I'm staying on top of it."

"Good. I don't want your grades to drop. You need good grades so you can go to New York."

"So _we_ can go to New York," Blaine corrected sweetly.

"Well I'm not worried about my grades," Kurt huffed playfully, opening the door for Blaine. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"I can't wait," Blaine smiled, giving Kurt a lingering kiss. "I love you."

"Love you too," Kurt breathed softly.

Blaine gave one last smile before stepping off the porch.

Kurt shut his front door, walking around the window to look through it, watching his boyfriend slowly getting to his car and driving away. Kurt rubbed his left form arm unthinkingly, it was hurting again, worse than before. He told the Doctors about the pain, they knew, but no one else did, not really.

X

Once Blaine was home he opened his assigned reading for his English class, wanting to please Kurt. Lately he had been spending more time researching bone cancer than focusing on his studies. And who could blame him? He needed to know. He needed to be prepared, he needed to be able to help, and knowledge was power.

Kurt was going for a Cat scan, which meant he would probably get an MRI done as well. If the Doctors found any tumors the would do a biopsy and see what they were dealing with. Given Kurt's age there were really only two possibilities, and Blaine was just hoping it wasn't Ewings Sarcoma. Osteosarcoma was more likely but Ewings wasn't off the table yet, and Blaine would prefer the lesser of two evils.

They still had so much to do and a stupid disease wasn't going to get in the way. Kurt was stronger than that, stronger than cancer. And Blaine would be that strong too.

_For in that sleep of death what dreams may come_

Blaine shut his book, tossing it to the foot of his bed. What did Shakespeare know? Hamlet was a stupid play anyway.

X

Kurt had his first surgery in November. There was a tumor in his left arm and his left knee. Surgery was scheduled for Monday the twenty-first and Blaine begged his parents to let him play hooky from school that day so he could be at the hospital with Kurt's family. They agreed.

The day before is of course a Sunday, and he wanted to be with Kurt then but his family goes to Church every Sunday and his parents think it's important that he keeps going and they tell him he can always go to Kurt's house afterwards.

Blaine doesn't feel much for God. He thought he did once, when he was little. Felt Him in the words of the sermon and saw Him in the congregations many faces. But as he got older he didn't really feel it. But he appreciated the people there who didn't care that he was gay and he ignored the ones that hated him there because he was. And he loved the singing and the familiar smell of the pews. The Pastor, who had known Blaine ever since the Anderson Family had moved from Illinois eleven years ago was respectful enough never to bring what the Bible said about the homosexuals up while the Anderson's sat in the fourth pew from the front. Maybe it was because his nephew married Blaine's older sister or because he knew Blaine long enough to know it didn't really matter, whatever the reason he wasn't uncomfortable being there.

So Blaine didn't really mind Church, he didn't enjoy it but he certainly didn't mind it. And he wasn't sure if he believed in God, he knew Kurt didn't. He knew Kurt respected his other friends religious views but Kurt didn't believe and he had very valid reasons not to. So Blaine wouldn't tell him about this, in case it offended him, but Blaine prayed for the first time in quite a while, just as the assembly was rising to go.

_Please don't let Kurt die_.

"Please don't let me boyfriend die," he whispered softly, his hands clasped together, resting on the back of the pew in front of him. His forehead was pressed into the sharp knuckles of thumbs and his eyes began to water and burn when his praying turned to begging. "_Please_."

X

The doctors go in and call it a success. Kurt can't walk for a while, his knee has to rest and his mind wanders back to when Mr. Schue challenged them see what things were like for Artie and he is almost grateful for the practice. He already knows where the ramps in his school were and fortunately it's only one day at school, because its Thanksgiving that week and they get the rest of the week off.

Blaine is suddenly very grateful that his family always eats early on Thanksgiving, because Kurt invited him to have dinner at his house with his family. So when he finished around four at his house, swung his nephew into hug, held his sister tightly and shook his brother-in-laws hand, he's just about ready to go. He kissed his mom and waved to his dad and bounced down the drive to his car.

"Blaine, wait a minute."

Blaine stopped outside his car door, his Dad walked briskly to him, holding a box in his hand.

"What's up?"

"Well, we originally got this for you for Christmas, but I figured you could use it now. I thought..." Blaine's Father seemed to trip over finding the right words. "Well I thought you could use it."

Blaine took the box, looking at the picture of the Nikon displayed on the top. It was a nice one too, not cheap.

"You said you wanted to try photography and needed something more than that dinky digital you have. You can try it out at Kurt's tonight."

"Thank you Dad," Blaine said, surprised. "You remembered? I said that months ago."

"I listen," he shrugged, looking awkward. "I know I haven't always, and for that I'm sorry, but I love you Blaine. You're my son and you mean the world to me. I'm sorry that it didn't seem that way for a while." Mr. Anderson raised a hand and clapped firmly on Blaine's shoulder, giving him a one armed hug.

"Thank you, Dad. Really, thank you."

"Alright go on," he urged. "You can take some pictures of Kurt, he's got...a nice smile. He's uhh, a good looking young man."

"He is," Blaine agreed softly. "Thanks, for everything, I'll see soon."

"Drive safe."

"I will, I love you, Dad."

"I love you too, Blaine."

X

Blaine laughed quietly, pulling out his camera and snapping a picture of a scowling Kurt.

"Has someone checked the yams!" Kurt called our, irritated that he was forced to remain seated at the table while everyone else did the cooking.

"Yes, sweetheart," Carole said, coming out to set a basket of rolls on the table.

"And you used the butter less recipe for the mashed potatoes?"

"Yes, I did. Just relax Kurt, I know you want to be in there helping but you need to rest. We've got this handled."

"I trust you Carole," Kurt assured her, "but Finn's in there with you too, you must understand my concern."

Carole just smiled sweetly, kissing Kurt on the forehead. "He is working on the least dangerous of tasks I promise."

"Okay."

Blaine stood up, setting his camera down. "Do you need anymore help? Is there anything I can do?"

"No you just sit here and keep grumpy pants company. Everything's almost ready."

Blaine took a seat next to Kurt, placing his hand on Kurt's non-bandaged knee. "You okay?" He asked, kissing him below his ear.

"I guess," Kurt sighed. "It's only...I always cook thanksgiving dinner and this year all I got to do was peel potatoes and shuck corn."

"And I'm certain you did it wonderfully."

"You're so goofy," Kurt smiled, leaning into him. "Thanks for coming."

"I'm glad you invited me."

"Mike was talking about having a holiday party this year, when we get off for winter break. If we do, would go with me?"

"Oh course, and I'll only drink egg nog."

"Goof ball," Kurt laughed, kissing him quickly, just before the rest of the family joined them, placing the final dish on the table.

Kurt of course was opposed to the idea of saying grace, but was a firm supporter in people sharing the things they were thankful for. They started with Finn and went around the table, ending with Kurt. He was thankful for his friends, and Glee club. And for Doctors, Nurses and Anesthesiologists. He was grateful for his family and for Blaine, and for them all being alive and around the table.

It was a remarkable dinner.

X

Kurt recovered well. He was walking around perfectly normal in about a week and no one would guess that he had tumor cut out. Kurt smiled brightly, he had another Doctors appointment in a week to check everything out but he was feeling fine, no pain, which was always a good sign. He even convinced Mr. Schuester to let him learn their newest routine.

He was finally starting to feel normal again, until his leg went numb mid jump

X

Blaine's phone went off during his final period geometry class. It was a loud ringing he had assigned to play when Mr Hummel called. He didn't hesitate to answer it. "What's happened?"

"Mr. Anderson! Put your phone away," his teacher barked, aghast.

But Blaine was gathering his bags, ignoring his teachers question and protests. "No, I'm coming."

"Mr. Anderson! Where are you going?"

But Blaine was out the door, leaving his class looking stunned.

Mr. Burkes looked around, bewildered. "Can anyone tell me the meaning of this?"

Most of the class didn't have answer, but a few Warblers looked at each other wearily, unsure of whether they should say something or not. Finally Jeff raise his hand slowly.

"His boyfriend has cancer."

X

It turns out if a person gets a tumor in certain parts of the body they can press of against the nerves, causing those areas to go numb. Kurt had been admitted and located to a hospital bed by the time Blaine was able to make it there. Burt, Carole, and Finn were sitting in the chairs around Kurt's bed not saying anything. Kurt meanwhile glared at the dull white wall, and when Blaine rushed into the room his frown only deepened.

"Blaine, what are you doing here?"

"Are you okay?" Blaine asked, dropping his bag and pressing a hand against Kurt's forehead and cheek. "What happened?"

"Blaine, you're supposed to be at school."

"You're dad called, told me you were in the hospital."

"Dad!" Kurt whipped his head angrily to the side to send his father a glare. "I asked you not to call him when he's in school. He can't ditch his classes to come here over every little thing."

"But Kurt, I want to be here."

"And I want you here too but not when you have class. You know how strict Dalton is about grades and attendance, you don't get to screw that up because of me,"

"Okay, calm down," Blaine urged. "I'm sorry. I won't leave Dalton early anymore. Just, tell me what's wrong."

Kurt sighed, falling back into his pillows. "Probably another tumor in my leg. It's growing against some nerves, which is why I can't feel my leg."

"You can't feel..."

"They say it should only be temporary. I'm waiting for them to take me for an MRI and hopefully that's the only tumor there and they can schedual surgery to try and remove it."

"And if there are others?"

"Then they'll try and remove them too. We won't know anything for sure till the MRI is done."

"And how are you?" Blaine asked, kissing his forehead.

"Angry."

"Kurt–" Blaine started to plead.

"Well I am," Kurt snapped. "I'm angry that I thought everything was going to be fine and it isn't."

"It's okay to be angry Kurt," Burt spoke reasonably. "You're allowed that. But you don't have to be mad a Blaine for leaving a class a little early to be here."

"I'm sorry, I just..." Kurt flailed momentarily, trying to find his words. "You guy's have to understand that I don't want any of you changing you're lives over this. You can't just drop everything. You all still have lives."

"And working through all this is just a new part of them," Carole said with a light smile.

Finn nodded enthusiastically. "It's what family does Kurt."

"Okay, you guys don't have to make me feel guilty," Kurt pouted.

"We aren't meaning too," Blaine promised, giving him another small kiss. "I'll be right back, I'm just going to call my parents so they know where I am."

Blaine slipped his phone out of his pocket and walked several paces down the hallway, not wanting to be overheard. "Mom? Can I ask you something? Well, a few something's actually."

X

There were two tumors in his leg, but the Doctors were able to remove both of them. But when tumors grew at such a rapid pace there was an obvious need for concern. He was required to come in for scans once every other week, but if anymore popped up, the Doctors highly recommended chemotherapy.

When Kurt made it back to school he was surprised to see Blaine standing by his locker, out of uniform.

"What are you doing here?" Kurt asked, while Blaine smiled and hugged him tightly.

"I've been enrolled here for a week," Blaine explained. "We have a couple of the same classes, so I can help you catch up."

"Enrolled here?" Kurt asked looking stunned. "Blaine!"

"I know you're mad. And I should have told you but please listen to me first. I sure you think it was a really bad idea to leave Dalton, and I know you don't need me here and that my being here or there wouldn't make any real difference but I did this because I'm selfish and I want to be able to see you everyday. I did this for myself, so I could be with you, not so I could be your babysitter or anything like that. I just want to be here," Blaine ranted, reaching for one of Kurt's hands. "I need to be here."

Kurt wrapped his arms around Blaine, giving him an enthusiastic kiss. "I think you're an absolute idiot, but I'm also really happy to have you here."

X

In December Blaine invited Kurt on a trip. Two days in New York

It wasn't much but it was what could be allowed and afforded. Two days, and Carole would act as a chaperone. And Blaine has it all planned out. It took a lot of phone calls and e-mails but he had a plan. But he's been getting worried, and thinks he should call the whole thing off, because he always thinks he see's Kurt rubbing his arms out of the corner of his eye but when he turns around Kurt's just standing their, smiling.

"So why won't you tell me what we are doing?" Kurt asked coyly, as the walked slowly down the icy streets.

"Because it's supposed to be a surprise."

"I just don't understand what we could be doing on Broadway when shows don't run this early in the day."

"Just wait a few more minutes. We're almost there."

They trekked further down the block, finally stopping outside the theatre that was housing a revival of _Jekyll and Hyde_. A handsome and broad shouldered blonde waited outside. He smiled brightly as they approached, clapping a firm hand of Blaine's shoulder and pulling him into a hug.

"Hey Blaine, it's good to see you."

"You too," Blaine said, smiling largely when the man pulled away.

"And you must be Kurt, hello," he greeted, offering Kurt his hand.

"Kurt this is Aaron Colling. He was a few years a head of me at Dalton, and he's currently playing Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde in this production."

"Come with me guys," Aaron said, walking through the door's of the theatre, turning his head slightly to look at Kurt. "Blaine here got in contact with me a couple of weeks ago and said he was planning a mini trip to New York. He told me you were quite a musical enthusiast, are you familiar with this show?"

"Of course," Kurt nodded, his eyes wide. "This is so amazing."

"Why don't you two go and take a seat down front, we were about to run 'Murder, Murder'."

"Oh wow, really?" Kurt asked. "We can watch?"

"Yeah, I've sorted everything out with the director and the producer, it's okay."

Kurt tugged Blaine with him, dragging him to the front row to watch the opening number of Act II.

The both clapped enthusiastically when the number was finished. Aaron stepped down stage, wiping his brow. "Did you like it?"

"It was phenomenal!" Kurt squealed, "you guy's are amazing."

"Well thank you, why don't you come up here and give it try?"

"What?"

"Yeah," Aaron went on eagerly. "Girls, can you stay here, everyone else can take a seat in the audience. Blaine said you're a counter tenor, do you think you'd be able to sing 'Bring on the Men'?"

"What?" Kurt asked again, still bewildered.

"The girls will help you out."

"But that song–"

"You'll do great. Go," Blaine urged.

Kurt chocked in disbelief as he walked slowly up and onto the stage. The female dancers were setting up in the back and a stage hand came on to fix Kurt with a mic. This was very different from sneaking into a theatre with Rachel.

"So Kurt, you just stay towards the front and do your thing," Aaron explained, "and our lovely ladies will do their thing and work around you."

"O-okay."

Aaron took a seat in the audience next to Blaine and the leading ladies. The rest of the cast surrounded them, smiling encouragingly. The lights changed, a spot came up and the orchestra started to play.

Kurt swallowed, breathing deeply.

_There was a time_

_I don't know when_

_I didn't have much time for men_

_but this is now and that was then, I'm learning_

Blaine smiled widely. And while he knew Kurt was not the type to perform something as seductive as Bring on the Men, watching him sings Lucy's jazzy number, owning the stage , was a sight to see.

When Kurt finished the cast applauded enthusiastically letting out whoops and hollers.

"Well done Kurt!" Aaron beamed, hoping up on stage and waving for someone off stage. "That was really well done. Blaine, why don't you come on up here and get a mic on. You and Kurt have to sing together. What would you like to do?"

"'Someone like you'," Blaine said immediately.

"That's not a duet," Kurt pointed out.

"It doesn't matter," Blaine shrugged, lacing his fingers through Kurt's. "We'll make it work."

"Alright. 'Someone Like You' it is," Aaron said jovially, queuing the orchestra again.

"You know it right?" Blaine asked suddenly

"Of course I do."

"I'll start, then you go. Then we can do the rest together."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

Blaine started the song, playing most of it out to the audience, until he reached the first chorus. He then turned his focus to Kurt who stood stoically in the center of the stage.

_Wanting to fly -_

_But scared to try._

_But if someone like you_

_Found someone like me,_

_Then suddenly _

_Nothing would ever be the same!_

_My heart would take wing,_

_And I'd feel so alive -_

_If someone like you _

_Found me!_

Kurt's eyes shined under the lights of the stage, his hands shacking slightly at his side, but he sang strongly, his voice unwavering.

_So many secrets_

_I've longed to share!_

_All I have needed_

_Is someone there,_

_To help me see a world_

_I've never seen before -_

_A love to open every door,_

_To set me free,_

_So I can soar!_

Kurt turned so he too could address the chorus to Blaine. When he had finished Blaine walked purposefully to him and they started the repeat, hands joined, voices entwining in a harmony that came to them naturally and effortlessly.

_Oh, if someone like you_

_Found someone like me,_

_Then suddenly _

_Nothing would ever be the same!_

_My heart would take wing,_

_And I'd feel so alive -_

_If someone like you _

_Loved me..._

_Loved me..._

_Loved me!..._

"Blaine," Kurt breathed softly, just loud enough for Blaine to hear over the applause.

"Yeah?"

"I'm hurting."

Blaine carefully removed the mic tape from Kurt's cheek, unwinding the wires and removing the pack and doing the same for himself quickly. He looked solemn, handing them back to the technician, carefully looping his arm around Kurt.

"Alright. Let's go, we have to take you home."

"I'm sorry," Kurt apologized, his eyes starting to water. "I just really wanted to be here with you."

"It's okay Kurt."

"Thank you for this. All of you, thank you, you were all wonderful." Kurt wobbled slightly, sharp pain shooting through his legs.

"Aaron will you call me a taxi? He can't walk."

"Of course," Aaron agreed. "Mark! Can you come here?" A burly looking rigger came out of the wings, shaking off his gloves. "Could you please carry Kurt."

"Sure thing," Mark grunted

Kurt held on to Blaine for a moment looking at him with a sad intensity, his eyes beginning to tear. "You'll still love me when I don't have hair right?"

Blaine didn't have time to respond as Mark scooped Kurt up easily, carrying him up the aisle of the theatre.

Aaron placed his hand on Blaine's shoulder giving him a gentle squeeze.

"Thank you Aaron, for helping me, this meant a lot."

"Not at all Blaine. I'm sorry about all this. About Kurt. You guy were wonderful, maybe you'll get a chance to do it again. For real."

"I hope so, I really hope so."

Because Kurt had cancer, so hoping was all Blaine was able to give himself anymore.

X

"Kurt, you're being unreasonable," Dr. Chapman said.

"Its only four days! What difference does it make?"

"Kurt it can make a lot of difference. It's best if we star the chemo right away. The sooner the better."

"Please," Kurt said, "can't it wait till after Christmas?"

"I highly recommend not putting it off."

"If this doesn't work, if I die–"

"Kurt," Burt began to start tenderly.

"No, hear me out," Kurt carried on. "If this doesn't work. Or even if it does and it comes back there's a chance I won't survive and this could be my last normal Christmas. I want to be able to have that. Please, four days that's I'll I'm asking."

Mr. Hummel let out a long breath. "If that's what you really want Kurt."

"Mr. Hummel!"

"Let him have this," Burt told Chapman

"Fine, then we schedule you for the twenty-sixth and not a day after. I need you to be aware that you are delaying treatment against doctors orders."

"That's fine. We will see you in four days then Dr. Chapman, thank you."

"Thank you Doctor," Kurt said standing.

"Be careful Kurt. Make sure to take you prescriptions."

"Of course," Kurt nodded, leaving the office with his father.

X

"Kurt are you sure you should be going to this party? Everyone will understand if you decided not to go," Finn said.

"One of the reasons for postponing chemo was for this party. I want to be able to see you guys, and have fun with you guys before I'm stuck in a hospital room to weak to move, throwing up constantly and without hair."

"Alright, fine. Are you almost ready then?" Finn asked, stepping into the hall. "Blaine should be here any minute."

"Yeah, I'll be right down."

Kurt touched his carefully styled hair gently before opening the medicine case, taking out one of his bottles, he took the pain killer, swallowing it quickly and dryly.

Two more days of something that could be considered normal. The doctors went over all the side affects of chemo, and Kurt had done his own research and read over patients personal blog's about it, so was probably going to be his last hurrah for a while. And he was glad to be spending it with his friends.

He walked slowly and cautiously down the stairs, the rest of his house mates and Blaine were seated in the living room.

Blaine stood at attention, taking Kurt carefully in his arms. "You look wonderful."

"Thanks, you too."

"Alright boys have a good time," Carole said, hugging them.

"No drinking," Burt warned. "Finn, drive carefully."

"Mike's parents will be there," Finn said quickly, taking a step towards the door. "No need to worry about drinking, no alcohol there, we promise."

"Let me get the cookies from the kitchen," Kurt spoke, taking a step away from Blaine.

"That's okay," Blaine offered, setting a hand to Kurt's arm, halting him. "I'll get them."

"Blaine I'm perfectly capable of–"

"Its okay, go to the car with Finn and I'll grab them. The yellow tupperware right?"

"Yes."

"Put your coats on," Carole commanded sweetly. "Please watch out for ice."

"Yes mom!" Finn smiled, helping Kurt to the car.

Blaine came back through the living room, holding the container, looking apprehensive. "How is he?" He asked, looking to the door the boys had just exited.

"Don't you know?" Burt questioned back.

"I don't think he tells me. I thinks he's hiding a lot of it and I'm worried. And I want to be here on Christmas, I want to at least visit that day, but you know we're driving up to my sisters tomorrow so we will be there for the day and we probably won't get home till late so I won't be able to make it over till the day after and that's the days he goes in and I don't want to over step any boundaries but will I be able to be there? Will you guys be okay with me being there? I know I've been here a lot lately. And I know you must think I'm a little bit crazy, spending so much time here, and transferring schools and everything but I love Kurt and I want to be here and be informed. So if there's anything he isn't telling me that either of you know Would you please tell me?"

"Blaine sweetie, we only know what the doctors tell us," Carole sighed. "What comes from Kurt? That's a different story. We hear the same things from him you do."

"My son doesn't want to worry us with how he's feeling, My guess is it hurts more then he lets on, but he takes he prescriptions. And he says he's fine, that he's not worried about starting chemo but we don't know. We can only hope he'll talk to us when he's ready, and we just have to be here when he is. And you are more than welcome to be here for that Blaine," Burt gave him a reassuring smile. "You are welcome to be a part of this family."

"Thank you. I'm...Thank you."

"Now go, they're waiting."

"And have a good time," Carole added.

Blaine finally made it out to the car, sliding into the back seat.

"What took you long?" Kurt asked.

"I had to sneak a cookie, wanted to try them before they all got devoured."

"You should have asked, I set some aside for you already."

"More for later than," Blaine laughed.

They got to Mike's house and everyone else was already there. They greeted the three boys joyfully, pulling them into hug's and taking them to the living room. There was a table set up with food and drinks. All of glee club was piled on chairs and the floor, laughing and telling stories. After the white elephant gift exchange it was time for karaoke.

Puck and Rachel did a Chanukah tribute. Tina, Brittany and Mercedes performed a song called the 'Elf's Lament.' The boys sang 'Jingle Bell' rock, but Santana blew everyone away with her rendition of 'Santa Baby'.

Kurt opted not to sing. So Blaine sang to him instead. "Since I won't be able to spend Christmas day with you, this seems to be appropriate."

So Blaine sang 'Blue Christmas', and everybody awwed, even the boys.

They finished the night with what all the girls claimed to be the greatest Holiday movie of all time, 'Love Actually'.

Blaine and Kurt had claimed the love seat. And as the sat snuggled together, watching Laura Linney's character slow dance with the man of her dreams to Norah Jones sultry tones, Kurt turned his head, letting his nose graze against Blaine's neck before he placed a kiss under his ear, sighing into his skin.

Blaine shifted slightly, his fingers going under the collar of Kurt's shirt, guiding Kurt so there lips met.

"Merry Christmas Kurt," he whispered when they pulled apart.

"Merry Christmas," Kurt agreed, snuggling closer as the watched the rest of the movie.

X

"Are you home?"

Blaine laughed into his phone. "You have amazing timing. We got home about ten minuets ago. I just finished putting the present away. How was you day?"

.

"It was fine, but I need you to come over tonight."

"Is everything okay?"

"Yeah," Kurt carried on, slightly breathless. "I just really need you here. Can you please come?"

"It's after eleven," Blaine pointed out. "Your curfew's in thirty minutes."

"Dad and Carole went to bed early, exhausted from all the festivities. Tell me you'll come."

"Okay, do you need anything? Can I bring something for you?"

"No, just you," Kurt said. "I'll see you soon?"

"Heading out the door as we speak," Blaine promised, grabbing his bag.

"Drive safely okay, send me a text when you're here."

"Okay."

The house was dark and Kurt opened the door silently for Blaine letting him into the quiet house.

"Hey," Blaine whispered, kissing him. "Merry Christmas. I thought I wasn't going to see until tomorrow."

"It couldn't wait."

"What's wrong?" Blaine asked, his brows knitting together.

"Nothings wrong," Kurt promised soothingly, lacing his fingers through Blaine's. "Just, come with me."

Kurt pulled Blaine quietly up the stairs, taking him to his room, shutting the door softly behind them.

Kurt took a few steps back surveying Blaine. "We've been dating for a while."

"Eight months and going strong,"

"And I'm going to start chemo tomorrow."

"Yes."

Kurt broke eye contact, dropping his gaze to the floor. "Will you stay the night with me?"

"Of course," Blaine said, stepping forward. "If you want me too."

"No," Kurt stopped him. "I mean stay the night and be with me. Really be with me."

Blaine's heart halted in his chest. "Oh, Kurt–"

"I know we haven't talked about it, but after tomorrow we may not get another chance."

"Kurt–"

But he carried on. "And I don't want you to say yes to appease me because of the chemo or because you feel that you have to because I'm sick and you feel obligated to say yes, I want you to want to do it. I want you to want to this as much as I do because we love each other. I want this to make you as happy as I know it will make me. I don't feel like I'm wasting myself on something that isn't worth it. You've been so wonderful and caring through all of this. You're perfect and I want to give this to you. I can't imagine being with anyone else the way I want to be with you." Kurt looked up, his eyes searching Blaine's face. "Say something, please."

Blaine swallowed thickly."I would give you the moon if you asked it of me."

"Just you," Kurt rushed. "That's all I want, only you."

"Kurt I wouldn't deny you of anything you wanted, but are you absolutely sure?"

"Only if you want it too."

Blaine walked forward, pressing his forehead against Kurt's. "I could never say no to you."

So Kurt traced the buttons on Blaine's shirt, walking backwards towards his bed, kissing him languidly.

Blaine pulled back slightly. "Do you have–"

"They're under the pillows," Kurt answered, pulling Blaine back into a desperate kiss.

"Kurt, you have to tell me if anything hurts–"

Kurt scoffed. "I took my pain meds."

"Kurt, I'm serious," Blaine said. "If I hurt you in any way or you experience any pain you have to tell me."

"Can we just pretend I don't have cancer?"

"Kurt..."

"Just for tonight," Kurt pleaded. "Forget I have tumors in my bones. There's nothing else in the world but us for a few hours, just us."

Blaine smiled reluctantly. "Kurt Hummel I love you."

"Then show me."

X

It's almost seven when they woke up, wound tightly around each other, smiling soppy, brilliant smiles.

"Kurt I have to leave," Blaine said reluctantly, trying pull on his shoes while his boyfriend graced his hands across his bare shoulders and chest.

"Stay. We'll just tell everyone you came really early today."

"No one wold believe that."

"No one will be up yet," Kurt whispered against Blaine's ear. "Stay for a little while longer."

"I should get a shower," Blaine reasoned. "You should get a shower. I'll be back before you know it."

"Save time and shower here."

"Kurt!" Blaine moaned.

"We can do it together," Kurt added playfully.

"Oh my...Kurt!" Blaine blushed brightly.

"I'm sorry," Kurt apologized with an enormous smile. "I just feel...wonderful! I haven't felt this good in a while

"Look, I'll drive my car around the corner and get a cup of coffee, you take a shower and then I'll come back. Twenty minuets, tops."

"Fine, but I'm walking you to your car. I don't want you to feel like this is the walk of shame." Kurt slid slowly out of bed, reaching for the shirt he wore the night before and pulling it over his head with an unavoidable stiffness.

"You okay?"

"Yeah, just a little achy. Can you hand me my pants?

Blaine smiled, helping Kurt in to his designer flannels and slipping a pair of converse over his feet. Blaine wrapped his hands carefully around Kurt's hands, pulling him to his feet. "If you're tired you don't have to walk me out."

"I want to, just, don't let go."

Keeping Kurt supported against his side the stumbled from the room. Kurt tried to control a giggle as Blaine tripped over the bottom of his pants that were hanging low because he hadn't done up his belt. Blaine's back was against the wall, Kurt looped his free arm around the back of Blaine's neck, pulling him into another much needed kiss.

Blaine groaned slightly, his shoes falling out of his hand so his fingers could twist into Kurt's hair.

"Boys."

Kurt and Blaine separated, both staring at Mr. Hummel who could seem the perfectly from the second landing of the stairs. There wasn't any other way to interpret what was going on. Blaine's shirt hung open and both boys looking ruffled and tired and positively glowing. Burt Hummel knew that look.

Kurt tightened his grip on Blaine's hand, an overwhelming sense of fear restricting his heart and making his palms sweat. "Dad."

"Kurt, can I see you in the kitchen?"

"Dad, please–"

"Kitchen."

Blaine gave Kurt's hand an encouraging squeeze, stepping down the steps.

"No," Burt commanded. "Blaine you stay." Burt tromped down the stairs, clearly expecting Kurt to follow.

"I'm scared," Kurt breathed, his eyes wide.

"Hey, it's going to be fine. He doesn't seem that upset."

"It's not just that. I'm scared about this. The cancer and chemo and not getting better. I'm afraid Blaine."

"I know," Blaine said, wrapping Kurt into a hug. "I know you are but we're going to be here with you the whole time. I'll move into the hospital if you want me too. We all would. You're the strongest, bravest person I know. You can do this."

"Kurt!" Mr. Hummel called.

"Go, you'll be fine. And I'll be here when you're done."

Blaine waited at the foot of the stairs, hearing the muffled voices from the kitchen, but unable to make out what was being said.

After some time Kurt burst from out of the kitchen looking distraught.

Blaine stood, reaching out for him. "Kurt!"

"Leave me alone!" Kurt hissed, running past him and out the front door.

"Kurt, wait!"

"Let him go." Burt said, coming out of the kitchen.

"It's freezing out there! He'll catch his death."

"He needs a minute to cool down. He'll be fine."

"But–" Blaine stopped abruptly, remembering who he was speaking to and what had just happened. "Mr Hummel, I... I'm sorry. I shouldn't have...I disobeyed your rules and I really shouldn't have. You've been so kind and understanding and generous to me and I've obviously betrayed your trust. But he called me last night, and normally I wouldn't have come after his curfew but you have to understand that I...I couldn't say no. He...I just couldn't. But I hope you know I love your son very much. He's everything to me. And though I can say I'm sorry that this happened they way it did but I'm not sorry it happened. I couldn't say no Mr. Hummel, I'm sorry but I couldn't."

"I know."

"What?"

"I know," he repeated. "I know that you couldn't have said no. I know it wouldn't have even been your idea. You're a good kid Blaine. You're a really good, smart, caring kid. You've been, noble. Through this whole thing and very brave. I know this has been just as hard on you as the rest of us. And while I don't condone what you two did and while I don't appreciate the rules that I have in place here being broken, I understand. And I forgive you. If anything I should apologize. I'm afraid my son may have taken advantage of your feelings for him."

"No sir, at least, I don't feel like I was taken advantage of. It was– I'm sorry," Blaine blushed. "I shouldn't be...This is already awkward, I don't mean to make you uncomfortable."

"You aren't making me uncomfortable," Burt reassured him. "Most fathers actually want to hear when there sons take that step. And I know you aren't my son, but I do consider you a part of this family. I'm not saying I want to hear the details, but if you wanted to talk about it, you could."

"I..." Blaine flushed embarrassed. "It was really amazing Mr Hummel. I honestly haven't felt the way I feel about your son with anyone else. The whole experience, it was amazing. Not just physically, but emotionally, I hadn't...It was more than I imagined."

"Well," Burt sighed, giving Blaine a slap on the back. "I couldn't be mad at you for that."

X

The first day of chemo was okay, Kurt felt pretty normal, but the second day it hits hard. And it continues to hit hard. Kurt's exhausted, he can't get out of the bed and the very idea of food just makes the excruciating nausea he already feels almost unbearable.

He felt sickly and unattractive, but he allowed Blaine to give him a New Years kiss anyways. He doesn't want to be to tired to kiss Blaine or hold his hand, but sometimes it feels that way, and that feeling makes him cry, even though he's far to tired for that too.

The morning he woke up with pieces of his hair staying to his pillows is what really upsets him. And he called Blaine and begged him to skip school and spend the day with him. Blaine came of course, and brought all the guys in the glee club with him. Each, even the ever prideful Puck, have shaved their heads.

Kurt cried at them, swore he wouldn't forgive them for the crime against style they have all committed. Finn gave a big goofy smile, saying they did it for solidity.

"Solidarity, Finn," Blaine corrected, holding up a pair of electric sheers. "We thought it would make it easier for you."

"None of the girls did it, did they?" Kurt asked in a panic. "Because if they did–"

"We knew you wouldn't want them too," Blaine reassured him. "Though Santana seemed to be very tempted, but Mercedes talked he out of it."

"You guys shouldn't have done this. Just because my hair is falling out doesn't mean you had to join me in egg headedness."

"You're our boy, Kurt," Puck proclaimed proudly.

Artie shrugged in agreement. "It's just hair."

"I wanted to," Blaine said, taking a seat on Kurt's bed. "I know you've been really self conscious about all this but I love all the same, no matter how you look."

"It was a really nice gesture, and I appreciate it. But don't do it again, let your hair grow back out. Bald is not a look for everyone," Kurt smiled cheekily. "I can pull of anything though."

"You ready then?" Blaine asked.

"Yeah. Get ride of it. I'll have Mercedes bring me my scarves later."

"Alright." Blaine fumbled to find an outlet behind the small table of drawers by the bed.

"Hey guys, why don't you grab some stuff at the cafeteria and then come back, we can find something to watch on this lousy TV," Kurt suggested.

The other boys mumbled and nodded, filing out the room in a familiar and normal manner, much like they would leave a classroom at school. Kurt missed that. Missed seeing it and being a part of it. He sighed heavily his head falling to the side to look at his smooth scalped boyfriend.

"You sure?" Blaine questioned.

"Yes, it's better to just get it over with instead of just watching it fall away bit by bit."

Blaine smiled, sitting down on the bed. He cupped Kurt's cheek and leaned down, placing a light kiss to his lips. "You're the bravest person I know."

"You shaved your head first," Kurt pointed out. "Alright, go on. Sheer me."

Blaine flipped on the switch, running his hand lightly over the top of Kurt's hair one last time before softly setting the blades to his temple, buzzing off the first section of hair.

It's over quickly. Blaine brushed all the hair into a waste basket and Kurt ran his hand over the new smooth surface.

"Its colder than I anticipated," Kurt mumbled.

Blaine laughed and pulled a beanie out of his bag. He kneeled on the bed, sliding it carefully over Kurt's scalp. "Until you get your fancy scarves."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome," Blaine said, kissing his forehead affectionately. To his surprise Kurt raised his hands, pulling Blaine into a full and much deeper kiss. They broke apart slowly, breathing in a heart filled heavy way.

"I'm sorry I've been so distant lately," Kurt mumbled, looking abased. "You've been so patient and doting and I haven't been very appreciative."

"It's okay Kurt, your going through so much and it's hard and you're tired. I'm not bothered by it."

"You're going through a lot too. I'm so unbelievably grateful and lucky to have you. I don't feel worthy of you. I wish I could do something for you, to show you how much I appreciate it, but I'm stuck in this bed."

"Hey," Blaine said softly. "It's fine. Don't worry about it. Just promise me I can have you all to myself on Valentines day and we have a deal."

"I've already made reservations for my Dad and Carole so they can have the day all too themselves so I'm all yours until the visiting hours are over."

"Now I have two weeks to form a perfect plan."

"You being here will make it perfect enough."

"Hey Blaine, BBQ chips okay with you?" Sam asked as the boys came back into the room.

"There fine."

"Alright, so what kind of channels are you getting in here?" Mike enquired, pulling up a chair.

"Bad ones," Kurt told them.

"Then let's what some bad Tv, "Artie laughed.

And with all of the guys crowded in the hospital room, Kurt was happily distracted, and at times like these, Kurt couldn't have asked for anything better.

X

As promised the spent Valentines together just the two of them. Blaine had brought a basket full of all of Kurt's favorite things, Movies CDs, books, and food. Blaine gave Kurt a hat and scarf set and a few new books to keep him occupied.

Blaine helped Kurt wrap the scarf around his neck, grinning. "I was right, it's the perfect color for you."

"I look great in anything."

"Yes you do."

"Okay," Kurt giggled. "You're gift is in that top drawer, can you reach it?"

Blaine leaned over, pulling out the envelope.

"It's kind of silly, so do me a favor and open it later."

"Awww, but Kurt!" Blaine whined.

"Please?" Kurt pouted. "Just open it later. I'll be less embarrassed."

"Okay, I'll wait. But only because I love you."

"I love you too. So very much." Kurt, snuggled closer to Blaine, trying to hide as yawn.

"You tired?"

"A little."

"Go ahead and sleep," Blaine told him. "I'll be here when you wake up."

"No, I don't want wait the visiting hours sleeping."

"You're tired, its alright. I'll nap with you." Blaine slid down further, carefully adjusting Kurt so he fit perfectly in his arms. "I won't leave."

"Happy Valentines day," Kurt mumbled sleepily.

"Happy Valentines day."

X

Blaine, true to his word didn't open the card till he was home. Shut alone in his room, he carefully opened the envelope, pulling out the Valentines day card. It was an effervescent white, with soft pink print.

_Valentines day is for everyone_: it read on the front, flipping it open something fell out of it. _But I think it was made for us, _he read quickly on the inside, before picking up the photo that had slipped into his lap.

The picture of a beautiful brunette women holding a squirming but happy toddler in her arms.

He looked to the left inside flap of the card, Kurt's flowing script filling it.

_Dear Blaine,_

_I know you've been having so much fun taking all those picture with your new camera, but I really wanted you to have this picture. If you couldn't tell, its of me and my mother. My favorite picture of her actually. I want you to feel like you've been a part of my whole life, even the parts you weren't there for. I know it's kind of a silly gift, but its hard to do proper shopping when you're stuck in a bed. You're so important to me Blaine, I love you so much and I can't explain how much everything you've done for means. All the things you've done for me, since the day we met. Please remember that I love you, no matter what happens. I love you more than I can ever say, Happy Valentines day._

_Love forever,_

_Kurt_

Blaine's heart constricted in the oddest way. It seemed that everything Kurt did just made Blaine love him more. But it had been a month and a half and Kurt hadn't gotten any better. And usually bot getting better, mean it had to be getting worse.

So on Sunday, the Twenty-sixth of February, freshly showered and half dressed, Blaine spits out a mouth full of toothpaste when his phone begins to ring.

"Hello?"

"Hey Kid."

And it's Burt Hummel, and his voice is filled with tragic heaves and watery eyes.

"Burt."

"You should come by the hospital, Blaine. You should...it isn't good Blaine, I'm...it's not good."

Blaine doesn't say anything, but he swallows thickly, his phone slipping to the floor. His eyes locked on his untied laces as they stand out dingy red against the stark white of the tile. He thought of unfinished things, loose ends and cut off dreams. He thought of Kurt, and he collapsed onto the floor, crumpled in a pile of gasping sobs and uncontrollable hot tears.

Burt was standing outside Kurt's room waiting for Blaine. And he told him exactly what they had been told by the Doctors. The cancer had spread and it was in Kurt's lungs. And when that happens, well, it's best to start preparing themselves.

Blaine fights back the urge to vomit. "Prepare themselves." He knew what that meant. He'd seen the Doctor shows and all the movies, he knew what that meant.

"They aren't stopping treatment are they?"

"No," Burt said, "They said they'll continue treatment if we wanted. But they said even with that he probably only has...only has a few days."

Blaine felt his legs start to give way. "Days...a few days..."

"Once it get's this far...you did the same research I did Blaine, you know what this means."

"Mr Hummel–"

Burt rubbed his face despairingly. "I can't...My boy... my little boy..."

Blaine didn't know if he's over stepping or not, but he threw his arm around Burt. He hadn't given a proper hug to his own father in a long time, and he hoped that he was doing it right, and that it's okay.

Burt let's out a strangled sob and hugged Blaine back. Because they understood each other. They were losing the most important man in their lives. And really, nothing could help or make them feel better.

X

Kurt wanted to see everyone separately. The glee club is called and informed and he asks for them one at a time. He starts with the boys. Sam is first, then Mike, Artie, Puck, Mr. Schue and then Finn. Next is Lauren, followed by Brittany, Santana, Tina, Rachel, and Mercedes. They each come back with red watery eyes. The girls cry openly, even Lauren and Santana ever the badass bitches are reduced to fits of tears. Carol is the next summoned. She's in there for quite sometime and when she came back out, she stood in the doorway looking around at the despairing faces, her hand pressed over her heart. She staled slightly, looking back and forth between the only two yet to go in.

"Burt, he'd like to see both of us for a moment," she finally said.

Burt looks a little surprised but goes in with his wife. Time goes by slowly, and Carole exits, leaving Burt alone with his son. The whole time the blinds have been pulled shut, and its hard to imagine what's happening behind them, possibly the last completely private moment between father and son.

But time was running out. It was getting late and the visiting hours didn't last forever. So when Burt stepped out of the room, Blaine stumbled quickly to his feet, his heart pulsing sharp and painful in his chest.

Burt rubbed his eyes. "Alright kid," he said, moving slowly away for Blaine to pass. Blaine almost tripped over himself hurrying to the room, he shut the door gently, walking over to the bed,

"Hey beautiful," Blaine whispered, sitting as carefully as his could next to an exhausted Kurt who tried to smile. His lips twitched slightly, but fell back quickly into a slightly down turned frown.

"Come here," Kurt urged, his voice was rasp and his breathing was strained and irregular.

Blaine shifted closer, but Kurt shook his head slowly, reaching up and pulling Blaine so he was laying almost on top of him. Kurt ran his fingers through Blaine's short, unruly, regrown curls, dragging his fingers down Blaine's neck and pulling his face close.

Blaine adjusted so Kurt could kiss him more easily. He braced himself so he hovered just above Kurt, while Kurt's trembling arm hung around his neck.

Blaine felt tears leak from the corner of his tightly shut eyes. Kurt pulled away, his breathing ragged. He brought an oxygen mask to his mouth, the other hand still resting on Blaine's neck.

"I'm sorry," Kurt said, moving the mask and letting his fingers brush the tears off Blaine's cheek. "I'm sorry Blaine, I tried."

"No, no don't apologize Kurt," Blaine professed earnestly. "You've been so strong and brave. You don't have to be sorry. I'm the one who's sorry. You're...You're the one who..."

"I don't want to leave you," Kurt's voice quivered as he stared to cry.

"Kurt–"

"It's not fair. I feel like I've only just found you and now my time with you had run out. It's not...It's just not–"

"Fair," Blaine breathed. "I know Kurt, it isn't fair and I'm so sorry I can't even begin to explain. I love you, I love you so much Kurt. More than anything. Please, don't...please don't go. You can do this, just hold on a little longer. They could have a cure tomorrow. You're so strong, you can beat this."

"Blaine," Kurt sighed, rubbing his hand softly along his cheek. "My sweet, wonderful, handsome Blaine. There's not going to be a cure tomorrow. I know that's what we all wont to believe, but that isn't going to happen."

"But Kurt–"

"I'm so tired, Blaine," He confessed. "So, so, tired. This had been coming for sometime, you know it has,"

"I can't do this without you," Blaine conceded. "I can't."

"No, Blaine you have to make me a promise. You have to do everything. You have to be and do everything you wanted still. I swear if you let this stop you I will be sure my spirit comes back to haunt you. You have to promise me you will live. You do that for me, and you make sure my Dad lives. Please, that's all I want."

"I already told you I'd give you anything you wanted."

"Then promise me," Kurt commanded. "Promise that whatever happens you won't let it stop you."

"Kurt..."

"Promise."

Blaine nodded, wiping his eyes. "I promise."

"Good, now come here, and kiss me until I can't breathe."

But as always the visiting hours ended. And the nurses asked Blaine to leave. Burt was able to stay, he already had it arranged. But Blaine wasn't family. So reluctantly he left. He didn't go far though. The waiting room didn't close, so he sat down in the uncomfortable chair and waited. Waited for eight to roll around so he could go back to Kurt's room.

X

Four days Blaine slept in the waiting room. He went home to shower and change and then he comes back every night. They all know where to find him if something happens. The nurses know who he's there for. The Hummels wake him up everyone morning at eight and bring him to the room.

On the twenty-ninth it's already past eight-thirty that evening and Blaine's holding Kurt against him, kissing his temple and letting his fingers graze the skin on his cheeks and neck while Kurt winds is fingers lazily though Blaine's fuzzy hair. Kurt's breathing is heavy, but he smiles serenely, humming quietly a song Blaine can't place.

"I love you," Kurt whispered, turning his face to rub noses with Blaine.

"I love you too," Blaine whispered just as quietly, letting his lips fall onto Kurt's with smooth synchrony.

"Hey boys," Burt said, stepping into the room. "Nurse is on her way down. I'm sorry."

"It's okay," Blaine sighed, slowly disentangling himself from Kurt's limbs and sliding out of the bed. He adjusted his clothes before bending back over the bed, kissing Kurt once more.

"You won't forget that promise will you?" Kurt wheezed.

"Of course I won't," Blaine breathed, a painful tightening in his throat constricting his voice. He coughed slightly, trying to loosen it as he felt the pin pricks of heat reach his eyes. Kurt reminded him of the promise he had made at every parting. "I'll see you tomorrow okay?"

Kurt dragged his fingers from the crook of Blains elbow, down his forearm to the tips of his fingers, pressing them to his. "Love you, I love you so much."

"I love you too Kurt, just rest alright. I'll be here first thing."

"I know, you always are," Kurt smiled, glad to receive another non hesitating kiss from Blaine.

Blaine took a few steps back. "Goodnight Mr. Hummel."

"Night Blaine. Get some sleep."

"Yeah, you too."

Blaine grabbed his bag and walked to the door, turning back to give Kurt a smile, which he was happy to see returned to him, Kurt's bright smile waning slightly with his tired eyes.

"Hey Kiddo," Burt said over the scrapping of the chair legs over the linoleum floor.

"Hey Dad. How are things at home?" Blaine heard Kurt say as he left, making his way to his usual waiting room spot.

X

"Mr. Anderson?"

Blaine was nudged and he jolted abruptly, almost falling out of the chair.

"Blaine?"

Blaine turned. One of the Nurses from Kurt's floor stood over him. Grace, Gracie, Kurt had called her.

"Blaine, I...I'm sorry. Blaine, Kurt...Kurt's..."

She looked at him with wide, sad eyes. Blaine stumbled shakily to his feet, leaving his things where they were as he proceeded to run through the hospital. His feet hitting the hard ground of the familiar hallways, dodging the surprised members of staff.

Blaine's heart dropped as he stood in the doorway, there was a Nurse turning off equipment and a Doctor writing on a clipboard, and Burt Hummel crying openly in a chair.

The early morning sunshine spilled through the window, the branches from the tree outside causing shadows to dance over Kurt's body, giving the cruel allusion of his chest rising a dropping, which Blaine knew wasn't happening.

He stepped with little coordination into the room, collapsing on his knees by the side of the bed, his hands clutching Kurt's cold one, sobbing in painfully sharp bursts, very much like Burt, overcome with despair of the lose of the boy who meant more to them then could ever be described.

X

Burt was very good to him. Carol hugged him like a son and the whole family included Blaine in everything. He sits with them at the funeral and they lean on each other when Mr. Schuester gives a speech, and they squeeze each other's hands when the Glee club sings a tribute to their fallen comrade. They let Blaine choose the outfit for Kurt, and gave in when he insists that the flowers they used had to be golden rod. Just like the dried bouquet that was placed in Kurt's casket. The one Kurt had kept since the start of it all.

Months later, Blaine still wakes up thinking of Kurt. And he knows it will be a long time before that stops. A long time before it stopped hurting when he thought of Kurt. But he makes himself think of the good things and the happy times. And he often flips through the album he had made for himself, which was only a little different from the one he gave Kurt's family. A few of the more personal photos of him and Kurt were better left to just him.

But this particular morning day was an important. Blaine dragged himself out of his covers, selecting his clothes and assembling his things. Today was the day. And he felt his stomach tumble in a mix of fear and anticipation.

"Wish me luck," Blaine spoke to the picture of Kurt he kept on his bedside table before he rushed out.

The room Blaine sat in was cold, but the three well dressed individuals who were sitting across from him smiled warmly and they flipped through paperwork and wrote the occasional note.

"So," the women in the middle spoke, looking at Blaine with scanning eyes. The two men on either side of her stopped their movements now, giving Blaine an equally inquisitive look. "Why do you wish to attend Julliard?"

Blaine looked down at his hands for a moment, turning the silver and blue stoned ring around his finger, rubbing it thoughtfully before looking up again, his smile a tender blend of honest joy and saddest melancholy.

"For Kurt."

X

A/N

**Inspired and Based on the song Casimir Pulaski Day by Sufjan Stevens.**

It's really a beautiful song and whatever your beliefs are I think it's worth a listen. I happen to be a non religious person and it is one of my favorite songs of all time. Such glorious imagery.

Also, I don't really know much about cancer and the healing process, so I do apologize for inaccuracies.

Thank you for reading.

Always,

Cleo Leo


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